|Dog walk shot VI, 2013|
One thing I've noticed changing is that as I observe my thoughts now, and I see them in shapes. For instance, when I'm really nervous about something it seems the source of that nervousness is replayed in my head on rapid-cycle whereas when I'm upset, I can visualize the thought itself, the source, in solid but jagged lines as though in an angular and bold font. Either way, the study of thoughts become abstract and less immediate. This awareness is distance from reactive cycles, and distance is perspective, which is peaceful.
I've been extremely busy and stressed lately, and these moments of peace have been like coming home. And sometimes, in the midst of a stressful or overextended feeling, I remember that home. So a year in: I think meditation is truly valuable in my world. Thought I'd share in case you read my Every since I started meditating post on how I thought meditation may have been putting me in a bad mood. I still think it was. Maybe a person needs to get closer to the less pleasant thoughts before she can stand back again and really look at them. Stressed, yes, and busy, yes: I still am. But, with a little more perspective, I realize that I can let it all go when I need to.
Writing is another form of meditation I have a longer history with, and I haven't posted much writing news lately. I will soon. I have a new interview on my writing process at Awkword Paper Cut (my husband did the image that accompanies my answer), and I received two acceptances recently, one from A-Minor and one from apt. I have quite a few short works coming out, and I look forward to sharing them.
Have a beautiful, peaceful week. -Jen